To be written and talked about

As I scanned through my Google Reader feed this morning, I was struck by today's Ask Beth Q&A - What Can We Do to Ensure Our Wedding is Published and Blogged About? I personally think this goal would cause me undo stress. But then, I've never been the type to want to appear in the Society Pages. Maybe this is the modern day equivalent?

Are you aiming for your wedding to appear online? Is your decision personal or business related?

The goal of all of our DIY/DIT projects is not to have our wedding showcased on the Interwebs. I know that what we're choosing for ourselves may or may not suit everyone's tastes. I also have a problem with labels.

Have you modified what you're planning to improve your chances of being featured? If you're already married, was your wedding featured? Was it what you expected? Would you do anything different? I'd like to know; maybe I'm doing this wrong.

Surprise!

Until I read Alyssa's latest post where she mentions her last birthday as a "single" as almost a footnote, I'd never thought about it. Then it struck me - both cubes and I have celebrated our last birthdays as "singles."

When cubes celebrated his birthday, neither of us yet realized we'd be crossing a milestone. We just moved in together and hadn't yet set a date.

When I celebrated my last birthday as a "single" we'd just decided upon our wedding date and chosen our venue. Again neither of us thought about it being the last birthday when I was "single."

Funny thing is that now that I know I've celebrated my last birthday as a "single" and thought about it some, I feel more excited about our next birthdays. The first birthdays we'll celebrate as part of a couple.

Did a milestone sneak up on you? Are there any milestones you're looking forward to celebrating together?

Hiding Wedding DIY in Plain Sight

So you've seen all the boxes that have been arriving. And you're probably wondering where they're going.

As you know we have a nice one bedroom apartment with a couple of closets. Unfortunately wedding DIY projects don't seem to stay neatly confined to workspaces (still packed computer and printing station in the office) or closets (sewing station in the living room). We've been trying to keep the wedding DIY sprawl to a medium - it's not really working.

Our entry hall has become a holding area (three boxes of linen are residing there currently). While actively working on a DIT project our coffee table transforms into a workspace. All the stationery has been designed right there - save the dates, invitations, and inserts. At the moment we're enjoying a coffee table free of projects.

In-progress stationery projects and found objects such as watchwerks and keys hide in plain sight, tucked neatly into the vintage train cases that will grace tables at our reception. The sofa table we use for buffets is filled with silver platters and beer and wine bottles we've acquired to date.

What strategies are you employing to keep your wedding sprawl under control? Did you appropriate a spare room or are trying to find space in other areas?

Incorporating books

I grew up surrounded by books. My dad's bookcases contained history, science fiction, politics, and more. My mom's bookcases contained art, accounts from early pioneer women, interior design, cookbooks, and more.

Early on I latched onto the idea of incorporating cookbooks into our design. Oh Lovely Day noted that vintage books were appearing everywhere.

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I've seen some neat uses of books beyond centerpieces by brides. Starting with the upcycling of a vintage book for use as a day planner (DIY Tutorial on Just Something I Made).

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For wedding invitations (seen on The Violet Hours).

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For a guest book (DIY Tutorial on Ruffled).

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For escort cards.

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Do you have a love of books? Are you incorporating them into your wedding? How?

Does anyone really notice the details?

I sure hope so. Often times I'll think a particular DIY/DIT project is done. Then I'll write up a blog post and notice some little thing that isn't just right.

Miss Stripes at WeddingBee wrote The Details Do Matter earlier this month. I took a look at the footer of our invitation and the footer of our inserts and how if lined up side-by-side the height differed. (Probably no one - and I mean no one - is going to do this. We're going to bundle the inserts and RSVP card to the back of the invitation facing outward). I examined how the bundle of RSVP card and inserts left three lines of text stranded. I stared at my "final" mockup. And I stared. (You'll have to forgive me my obsession with design. I work in the online media all day every day and for me print is a luxury. A luxury that I want to grab people's attention, from the choice of the paper to the layout to the choice of words.) Then I realized we hadn't included our website or a contact phone number with any of the inserts. I stared some more.

And then, I decided to revise the footers so that the package would have clean lines and no orphaned text.

Once all the invitations and inserts have been printed and cut to size, the packet will be bound with a thin charcoal or navy ribbon.

Do you find yourself checking and doublechecking the details?

A DIY Project that Isn't

From our previous posts you know that we're doing personalized cook booklets for our wedding favors, having signage that features lettering from vintage cookbooks, and creating centerpieces that include vintage cookbooks. As we're inviting all of our guests to share with us their favorite recipe(s), instead of a guest book we wanted to have a scrapbook/clipping book where guests can paste their recipe(s) and sign their names.

This idea sprung from two comments friends Nina and Heather made about collecting recipes and handwritten recipes. My mom (and my gram) collected index cards of handwritten recipes in 3x5 metal tins. My great grandmother clipped recipes and added them to her cookbooks (from what I've been told).

On Etsy (http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?listing_id=41240337) and Ebay, every once in awhile you'll come across someone's clipping book - a journal filled with collected recipes.

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I have an old three ring photo album binder that I've been putting recipes in for years. There are handwritten recipes, typed recipes, clipped recipes from magazines, as well as (gasp!) clipped recipes from cookbooks.

(Personal Photo)

Another DIY project was born. This one like the personalized cook booklets was high on the scale of must haves. Drum roll please... we were going to create own upcycled vintage feel clipping book/guest book.

NOTE: Handmade journals can be found on Etsy ranging in price from $15 to $60. When I first started looking I hadn't come across options that worked with our color scheme or highlighted cooking. The closest to what I was looking for were handmade journals adorned with antique jewelry by Gerri Newfy

(http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?listing_id=17419067) or upcycled dictionaries by Tomboy (http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?ref=vl_other_1&listing_id=29064129) and Wishful Thinking (http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?listing_id=15824026) or travel books by Sackcloth Design (http://www.etsy.com/view_listing.php?listing_id=40877195) but no cookbooks. Some Etsy vendors such as ElegantlyBound offered custom books (http://www.etsy.com/shop/ElegantlyBound).

This DIY Project wasn't going to save us any money - it in fact (like our wedding cake and our cake topper) it was going to be a splurge. Why? This clipping book is going be a frequent visitor in our kitchen and a reminder of our day where we were surrounded by friends and family.

I added the guest scrapbook to our Todo List. I scoured the Interwebs and found a couple of sites with instructions (http://www.cat-sidh.net/Tutorials/Binding.html, http://www.doe.in.gov/olt/grantprojects/books/Coptic%20Book.htm, http://www.altered-book.com/coptic-stitch.html) for how to make a coptic stitch binding (with this binding your book can lay flat - which is important when you're cooking). I was convinced I could make this project. I'd gone so far as choosing lovely handmade paper for the signatures.

And then I got real.

Just because I could create our guest scrapbook, did I really have the time?

This was one of the projects that wasn't easily handled by a group. So back to Etsy I went. I searched and searched for coptic stitch handmade journals (I'd become obsessed with coptic stitch binding). After weeks of browsing, I came across an artist who used recycled materials and had enough signatures in her book for each guest to provide a recipe (200 pages, 400 if you count both sides!).

cubes and I talked about the project and we both agreed we should make this purchase. Today I plunked down my cash and ordered - A Coptic Stitch Vintage Look Jute and Leather Journal 8 1/2 x 6 with Names from Crearting Handmade.

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I have ideas for a couple of customizations to bring it a little closer to what I'd dreamed of. But this is one DIY project that I'm relieved not to be tackling for the wedding. We're actually saving money by purchasing a journal.

Did you decide to pass on a DIY project? What did you do instead? Did you find that you saved money?

Get to Know Us: Our Story

I "wrote" the next installment of Our Story for our wedding blog this past weekend. (I'm actually editing - combining entries from my handwritten journal, email exchanges, and Tweets.) When we got engaged I put together a timeline of events. It's not complete. There's actually a gap in the timeline. A gap that I didn't realize until today. We've always talked about a standing weekly Wednesday dinner date and I'd always thought it began immediately - that we starting having dinner every week after that first dinner. But it didn't happen that way. Yes we eventually met for dinner every week (the night of the week actually alternated between Wednesday and Thursday and it wasn't always a given). You'll have to wait for details, just like I'm making myself wait.

When I first wrote the outline for Our Story and the first couple of chapters, I read it to cubes and we both laughed. It was true to my cheesy nature. Now that I just finished the fifth chapter, I've discovered that the process of writing goes beyond just putting words to paper figuratively speaking. (The first draft of my vows actually sprung into my head one day while I was working on the second installment of Our Story.) I can still feel the butterflies in my stomach when I think about how nervous I was the entire day of our first dinner. I can still remember the anxiety waiting for the next dinner date and wondering whether it was just a dinner with a friend or the beginning of a deeper relationship.

I'm very thankful that both of us chronicled our story via Twitter and Facebook, and that we were public about it. Even though I know where Our Story is today, reliving those early months is amazing.

What started out being cheesy has become more. I'm no longer writing the chapters of Our Story in advance as I'm enjoying the discovery process. As I re-read the emails and Twitters, I still can't believe this is our story - a love story. I also find the reality of the story better than the version we retell (like the standing weekly dates didn't begin immediately as we "remember").

Are you sharing your story with friends and family? Are you relying on memory or are you looking back to emails, Twitters, or a written journal?

Looking Forward

Almost everything we need to start stuffing envelopes with invitations and assembling the covers for our wedding favors has arrived! We've been working on other DIT projects in the meantime, but are looking forward to our first DIT Project Party. It'll be fun to unveil what we're planning and work with a group of our friends to make it real.

Here's a sneak peek at the treeless or vintage paper we're using to create the wedding favors.

From left to right, the papers shown are: Flower Fossil Textured Lokta Rust Brown, Thai Mango Aubergine, Thai Banana Coffee, Plum Raisin Mulberry Wrapping Paper, and pages from a vintage cookbook. We got the wrapping paper from Nashville Wraps and the handmade paper from Creative Papers Online.

Mathematical precision was used to determine the type (we could splurge as long as the individual favor cost did not exceed $1.60 per favor) and amount of supplies needed.

Let's Recap

This post also serves as a recap, for our friends and family who might be checking in every once in a while. The recap idea started as a way people could catch up on what we've been up to at their pace. We realized that not everyone wanted to have updates hourly (our Twitter feed) or even daily (this blog). And we didn't want to forget something, as with everyone's busy schedules we aren't always able to see/call everyone (and we forget who we've told what).

So without further ado, here's our recap. This past month was spent mainly ordering supplies and waiting. Boxes arrived almost daily. Many projects are almost ready to be started. The flip side of this progress is that it seems as if our To Do List just keeps growing. For every item we complete, we find something else we didn't think of. Our To Do List and progress since our last update:

1. (Done!) Chose a rabbi.
2. (In progress) Ask friends and family members to carry and hold our chuppah and witness the signing of our ketubah.
3. (In progress) Book a caterer.
4. (Done!) Find and secure a safe deposit box.
5. Retrieve wedding bands from jeweler and put in safe deposit box.
6. (Done!) Find and purchase shoes for cubes to wear.
7. (In progress) Have custom corset made (went for measurements).
8. (In progress) Have hat with birdcage veil designed and made (met with Esther).
9. (Done!) Determine what the women in the wedding party are wearing.
10. (In progress) Find a US-based custom shirt maker and order shirts for the men in the wedding party.
11. (Done!) Secure hotel room for night of the wedding.
12. Secure a block of hotel rooms for out-of-town guests.
13. Plan mini-moon (weekend after our wedding).
14. (In progress) Finish tablescapes (remove stems from flowers; need more bottles!).
15. (In progress) Find paper cutter, glue, etc. and order missing tools (corner punch) and more supplies (deckle and scoring blades, cartridges of ink, etc.) as needed.
16. (Done!) Design and write information inserts.
17. (In progress) Print invitations, information inserts, and reply cards (printed and neatly sorted).
18. Cut invitations and information inserts to size.
19. Assemble invitations.
20. Determine and verify needed postage using scale at post office.
21. Address envelopes.
22. Stuff envelopes.
23. Seal envelopes.
24. Apply postage.
25. Drop completed, addressed invitations in the mail and wait patiently for RSVPs to come in.
26. (In progress) Plan Burning Man ceremony (talked to Josh, set date - just before dusk the day of the False Profit Tuesday Night Party, and secured location - Syzygryd).
27. (In progress) Determine arrangement of tables for dinner and assign seats.
28. (In progress) Make pillows to soften Gothic chairs that guests can sit on during cocktail hour (selected and ordered plush that matches our wedding colors).
29. Figure out music for dinner and reception.
30. Write vows.
31. (In progress) Prepare day-of-survival bags for wedding party (selected and ordered eco-friendly bags).

What are you doing to keep your friends and family up to date? Are you using social media?

Almost done!

No not with all the DIY/DIT projects, but with the design and wording of the invitation inserts. And that means we can have a paper cutting, assembling, ribbon tying, hand addressing, envelope stuffing, postage sticking, and adhesive licking party!

The envelopes with stamped return address and myriad of RSVP cards have been done for about a week now and hiding in plain sight. (We're already using the vintage train cases we collected to use in our wedding decor for storage!)

While we've had a general idea of what we wanted to include with the invitations (the design of which had been done since end of March), until today we hadn't finalized the wording. Wording is done and insert design is done! (The idea of stacked wedding inserts came from Miss Cola, a Wedding Bee.) Here's a sneak peek of what they look like.

The invitation will be printed on Banana Paper Card Stock. Inserts will be printed on Banana Paper Printer Weight. RSVP cards have been printed on Canon Color Printer Paper.

Luckily we don't have that many total invitation suites we need to put together (87 total) as this design involves a lot of paper cutting. 4 cuts for the invitations. 3 cuts for the Directions insert. 4 cuts for the Around Town insert. And another 4 for the Sharing insert. That's a total of 7.5 cuts per invitation (2 per sheet) for a grand total of 653 cuts.

The original insert design was a tri-fold (no cutting involved) that would be slipped into the envelope with the RSVP card and invitation. It's a good thing we're done. Who knows what other creative things the Wedding Bees will share.

Did you find yourself rethinking one of your DIY projects after you saw another similar DIY project? Did you stick with your original plan?

From the Movies: It's not about the kiss

It's about the moment frozen in time. The emotion. The romance. It's about the timeless love affair.

I'm not talking about those famous kisses where two lovers part forever. Who could ever forget Bogart and Bergman in Casablanca? No I'm talking about the kisses where you know the lovers are at the beginning. Where you see and can imagine an amazing forever after. You know those moments where you want to be one of the lovers. You know, those moments that you wish were yours.

We have six frames in our apartment that are crying out to be filled with photos. One photo already chosen is a still-life of Spurious Causality - where cubes proposed - taken by Audrey. The second photo taken by Icka is of the two of us, specifically of me in cubes lap with his arms around me.

On the drive home the other night, OMD's If You Leave came on the radio. An image of cubes and I in place of Molly Ringwald and Michael Schoeffling popped into my head.

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I was in a ball gown. cubes was in a suit. We were sitting cross legged on top of a sofa table in front of one Brad's paintings. (If you were doing a dessert reception, wouldn't this be an adorable engagement session?)

Today I was listing to tunes from the 80s and I thought what it would be like for the two of us to recreate those moments - the one right before the kiss. Sixteen Candles is a must have (I always wanted to be the geeky girl who ended up with the guy). But what about Dirty Dancing as they begin to dance?

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Or the poets in Possession?

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Or Debra Messing and Dermot Mulroney in The Wedding Date?

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What movie moment do you see your FH and you in? What kisses would you recreate?

Food for Our Big Day

Two weeks ago we went for a tasting with our venue's caterer - Cafe du Nord. Trying to get to the tasting from Walnut Creek was a little stressful as a protest had temporarily stopped/delayed BART service, but we arrived exactly on time.

For our tasting we tried three appetizers, three entrees, and five sides. Chef Mike modified all but two of our choices so that most were Eden-friendly, meaning no products made from Cow's Milk (butter, cream, cream cheese) were used. An added benefit to the removal of dairy is that no one will accidentally mix meat and dairy (very important for some of our guests who follow a Kosher-style diet).

When friends warned us to go with an appetite to our tasting I was a little cautious. Luckily we went hungry. Chef Mike gave us healthy portions of everything and everything tasted so good that we just had to clean our plates.

The appetizers we tried were: Bruschetta with Vine Ripe Tomatoes, Garlic and Basil, Hummus on Grilled Pita with Sweet 100 Tomato and Kalmata Olive, and Crostini with Goat Cheese and Artichoke Olive Relish. (I apologize for the quality of the images - we were tasting in a club so the iPhone didn't capture the details very well.)

The entrees we tried were Ravioli filled with seasoned Porcini Mushrooms in Tomato-Thyme Cream Sauce (our vegetarian option), Roasted Chicken Breast with Lemon Caper Sauce, and Cross Rib Beef Roast with Cabernet Black Pepper Jus. (The lights were dimmed in the club as the first band of the evening was about to go on, so no photos.)

The sides we tried were Gourmet Mixed Green Salad with Roasted Pecans and a Balsamic Vinaigrette, Wild and Mixed Rice Pilaf, High Summer Squashes Sauteed with Herbs and Garlic, Tuscan White Beans with Rosemary and Garlic in Olive Oil, and Yukon Gold Mashed Potatoes.

With the exception of the Hummus appetizer which we'll be replacing with another Bruschetta (Bruschetta with Winter Greens Braised in Olive Oil with Chile, Garlic and Lemon), you'll find each of the options we tried on the menu at our reception. We're excited that we were able to put together a menu that avoided eggplant, walnuts, eggs, avocado, and offered options without cow's milk, tomatoes, or bell peppers.

What are you serving for your wedding reception? Were you able to find a menu that accommodated food allergies?

Had to happen sometime

Originally posted on LiveJournal.

I'm about to cheat on the tableware setting I thought I'd have forever. (Heck I've had some of the pieces since my twelfth birthday).

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You've read about this Dansk setting in Mooflyfoof's post about China. It's a lovely setting. I loved it and thought I'd never stray from it, until today.

Today we finally started the task of creating a registry. Merrily, unaware of what was about to happen, I went searching for open stock. The Dansk page came up empty. Naively, I went page by page to see if it was mismarked but somehow available online at the store (I really didn't want to go into the store - that would be wayyy too much temptation.) And... then it happened. My eyes feasted upon this lovely setting from Noritake. I could have been strong. I could have resisted the temptation. But no... I didn't. No, what did I do instead? I *shared* the temptation with cubes!

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A quick IM to cubes and we *knew.* These dishes screamed *us.*

Yep, we're not being practical or frugal. We already have 7 somewhat incomplete, inconsistent Dansk place settings.

I could justify this by saying the current place settings may go to a really good home (a home we all know and love), but who am I kidding. On this day of all days - Earth Day - I decided that I don't want to be practical or environmentally conscious. I like the idea of a set of dishes that we picked together.

Choices

Last night after our quarterly PR review meeting, we ate at one of my favorite restaurants - Mission Beach Cafe. As always we were a lively crowd - talking of food, wine, baseball, and other things. When we arrived, the table was set for six so cubes joined us and got to meet my work crewe. (He survived the vetting.)

So why am I posting about our meal on our wedding blog? Last night I realized once again that as long as you chose options that are true to who you are, the chances that a meal or a wedding will be "you" and not "cookie cutter" increase tenfold.

Here's why... the last restaurant I chose for our quarterly dinner, Limon, has become one of the crewe's favorites - he's been back there 4 times since we went in January. Earlier in the afternoon, he'd been asking me what I loved about the food - he hadn't heard of Mission Beach Cafe before. We'd had a discussion about beets and sure enough the flatbreads that I loved arrived with beets. He enjoyed the flatbreads (and the meal).

My nervousness about whether my work crewe would like my dinner choice reminded me of the various choices cubes and I are making for our wedding. As a couple, it's so easy to get caught up in the idea of being original, that is specifically wanting to do something you've never seen on a wedding blog and tossing out what you'd first dreamed of to find something "new." (We haven't done this - we're still having the cork escort card holders. We're still incorporating books in our table decor.)

Have you had an experience that made you feel good about the direction you're taking with your wedding?

Space and the lack there of

Celebrations have friends gathered around one table. Sometimes this table is one long rectangle. Sometimes this table is in the shape of an F. Other times in the shape of an L. But one thing is consistent. All of us are at 1 table.

So why on a beautiful Saturday am I once again talking about tables when it seemed like it was a done deal a few short weeks ago? Because somewhere I misunderstood how all our guests would fit in the hall for dinner. I'm still not sure how I missed this - I could have sworn I asked, especially as I wanted to avoid stairs and rope off the balcony. But nonetheless it turns out there's a reason our space has both round tables and banquet tables - 10 of each. All 20 of the tables fit inside the hall where we're having our reception. Not all the tables actually rest on the hall floor - some of the tables are set up on the third floor balcony.

Now I knew with our venue that we couldn't seat the total number of guests at 1 table. At 6 guests per banquet table when the tables are arranged end-to-end we'd only be able to seat 62 guests. I however had always thought all of our guests would be on the same floor. I always imagined looking out and seeing all of our friends and family members. With guests seated in the balcony, there will be some who I won't see.

It's stupid to be disappointed, after all it's just one meal. But we worked so hard to find a venue and set a budget so that we could invite as many of our friends and family as possible to both the ceremony and reception. All that effort and still some (more than some at least 12!) will miss seeing our faces during the toasts, our faces when we dance our first dance, etc.

I'd imagined after the ceremony and Yichud, that cubes and I would leisurely mingle with guests during the remaining 45 minutes of our cocktail hour. We'd skip the traditional reception line and go table-to-table to greet our guests and thank them for joining us. Unfortunately, there's not enough room on the balcony for us to greet the guests seated there.

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On the plus side... the tables on the balcony can be set up before the ceremony and the balcony roped off until the reception begins. On the downside... none of the round tables downstairs can be set up until after the ceremony is finished as the chairs take up the entire floor.

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Other than a couple of must haves/common courtesies to those who should be

seated on the main floor regardless of relationship

- friends or family with strollers, anyone with trouble navigating stairs, etc. - how do you determine who sits upstairs?

Did you have to change your seating plan last minute? Were any of your guests left without a view?

Softening Our Venue

In our venue we want to recreate a feeling of home. For the cocktail hour we'd like a sense that our friends and family are hanging out in "our" living room. We'd like people to be comfortable enough to take a seat or peruse a cookbook along the edges of the room. For the dinner hour, we want our guests to see themselves having a family meal with us.

Our venue is very spacious so coziness is a challenge. There are three levels - lobby with coat check and the bridal/ketubah room on the first floor, main hall for the ceremony and reception and hall for the cocktail hour on the second floor, and balconies in the main hall.

People who've attended weddings in the space have commented that the guests tend to spread out giving a sense that multiple parties are going on. We're planning on alleviating this partially by closing Balder Hall upon completion of the cocktail hour.

We'd also like to make the spaces more inviting (something along the lines of Krysta's comfy den in the upper right corner of the image below). We're thinking of adding plush throw pillows and bolsters to the fixed straight back chairs.

Image Sources (from left to right, clockwise): Freja Hall; Plush Fabric Swatches via Fabric.com; Living Room via Evil Chef Mom; Balder Hall.

Totally Random or Careful Placement?

Last night we took a break from Syzygryd (our project/camp for Burning Man this year) and called a Wedding DIT Project Night. We prepared by eating at our favorite sushi place - Sushi Zone (just around the corner from our place) and then dove in. cubes worked on the flowers for our tables, carefully removing the stems from the buds, while I worked on redesigning our RSVP cards to include our revised menu choices.

After all the flowers were destemmed, it was time to mock up a tablescape. The linens are very large and Sprite was very interested in them so they were quickly put away. At the center of each table, we're going to have candles in various bottles. The bottles are different sizes and different colors. We didn't realize that we'd initially grouped the bottles at random, not alternating as initially planned. While people probably aren't going to notice the detail, we started thinking about how we wanted the bottles arranged.

Which grouping do you like? Totally random (number 1), All similar colored bottles grouped together (number 2), Alternating colored bottles (number 3), or Other? Please tell us what you think.

Low Cost, Green DIY Wall Hanging

Have a large space that you want to decorate? Hang paper pinwheel flowers from eco-friendly ribbons.

Photography Credits: Jonathan Roberts via Ruffled

To create the paper flowers, upcycle pages from vintage books, phone books, etc. (You can find a DIY tutorial on Style Me Pretty.) To be even more green, reuse ribbon from gifts or purchase eco-friendly ribbons.

How I Created My Pinwheel Flowers (All DIY photos taken by Eden with iPhone.)

1. Remove 7 pages from a 8.5 x 11 book. (Chose a book that has missing pages and/or a broken spine.)
2. Cut the 8.5 x 11 sheets in half.
3. Fold 1 stack of 8.5 x 5.5 sheets in half.
4. Fold the stack of 8.5 x 2.75 sheets in half again.
   
5. Fold the stack of 8.5 x 1.325 sheets in half again.
   
6. Repeat Steps 3 through 5 with the remaining 7-8.5 x 5.5 sheets.
   
7. Separate the stack of 8.5 x 1.325 sheets, refold each sheet so that each fold is reversed (accordion style), close, and fold each in half cross-wise.
8. Open a paper clip.
   
9. Secure the paper clip around the middle of 7-8.5 x 1.375 accordion-folded sheets.
10. Fan out accordion-folded sheets and glue edges together.
    
11. Cut edges of flower.
12. Optional: For added dimension secure 1-8.5 x 5.5 flower to the center of 1-8.5 x 11 flower.
    
13. Secure 3 flowers of alternating sizes to a length of ribbon.

Where to Get Eco-Friendly Ribbon

• DivineLioness on Etsy's Recycled Grosgrain Eco-Ribbon By the Yard made from 100% post consumer waste, recycled plastic bottles in 7/8" and 1 1/2" widths (starting at $1.00 for 1 yard 5/8" width ribbon)
• Nashville Wrap's Sinamay Organza Mesh Ribbon made from 100% Natural Fibers in 1 1/2", 3", and 5 3/4" widths starting at $4.00 for 25 yds 1 1/2" width ribbon) or Eco Satin Acetate Colors made from Cellulose Acetate in 9/16", 7/8", and 1 5/16" widths (starting at $5.25 for 100 yards 9/16" width ribbon)
• Super Giftwrap's Earth Satin Ribbon made from 100% polyester in 3/8", 5/8", 1", and 2" widths (starting at $36.40 for 50 meters 1" width ribbon)
• Of The Earth's Double Faced Satin made from 100% polyester in 3/8", 5/8", 1", and 2" widths is processed with only environmentally friendly dyes (sample set of all 49 colors available for $9.99; ribbon starting at $52 for 50 meters 1" width ribbon)

Reusable Sandwich Bags for Wedding Party Snacks

April is Greener Weddings Awareness Month. On our blog we'll be highlighting ways you can make your wedding greener. The day of our wedding, we're probably going to be rushing around. Instead of using Ziplock bags for snacks, we're going to use reusable sandwich bags. It's a simple way an average family of 4 can save 1,200 to 2,800 bags a year (Source).

French Sleep Deprivation Study: Quilts, Cuisine, & Quirky Tidbits has an easy to follow tutorial and pattern. To be even more eco-friendly, repurpose fabrics that you have on-hand or purchase eco-friendly fabrics with low-impact dyes from Fabrics.com. (Fabrics.com offers free shipping on orders of $35 or more. You can also get 20% with this coupon code: 2WMYP9.)

If you're not the crafty type, check out Etsy. Here are some of the various designs you'll find:

Designer: TheSilverBobbin $5.50 ea

Designer: WasteNotSaks $6.50 ea

Designer: tHeENDpeace $16.00 for 3

Are you making little bags for your wedding party gifts?

To top it off

Last month I went to try on veils. At the time, I wasn't sure whether I wanted one or not - I'd always envisioned a cute little hat sitting a top my head.

Then... we met with the rabbi and she mentioned the veiling ceremony. All of a sudden I wanted a veil and I wanted one that my mother could cover my face with. The visit to the bridal shop left me less than enthused about veils. (Wearing a trenchcoat and turtleneck might not have helped the overall look.) After seeing me in the various veils, friends quickly suggested a birdcage veil.

So that I could try on the look I went in search of store that had birdcage veils. I found many cute little top hats with birdcage veiling but none that covered more than my forehead. Sorry there's no pictures as I was in a hurry and rushing home from work. I learned that I didn't want a veil that fell across my face at an angle and I didn't want a top hat.

Yesterday I met with Esther of E*star Hats. Until I visited her studio last year for my MOH's final wedding dress fitting, I hadn't really been a hat-type of girl. I *love* hats now and knew that if I ever got married I wanted her to design a hat for me to wear.

When I arrived yesterday I had no idea really of how a hat would come into existence. I brought our color palette swatch card; material swatches from my dress, table runners, and bouquet ribbons; theme inspiration cards; dress photos; hair trial photos; and veil inspiration photos.

Photography Credits (from left to right): Heather Fowler via Style Me Pretty, Heather Waraksa via Inspired by This

Over a cup of Wedding Imperial tea, we talked about the overall theme for the wedding and various elements that we were incorporating (keys, watchwerks, etc.). We discussed what I didn't like about the veils I'd tried on and which veils I liked. We sorted through watchwerks and vintage keys. We also talked about how I'd be wearing/using the veil. A clip to secure the hat was quickly abandoned in favor of elastic so that it stayed in place without messing up my hair.

I left totally excited about what we were planning. I also left firmly believing that every girl should have clothes or hats designed for them for scratch at least once in their life. The feeling you get from knowing the design is infused with your personality and meaning (if for a wedding or celebration) is absolutely amazing. I was walking on air when I left.

Have you decided to wear a veil for your ceremony? How did you decide what look you wanted?

All aboard!

for more of the orchard, visit the online gallery

We've shared with you two components of our decor previously - Real Touch Silk Dahlias and Peonies and Beer and Wine Bottle Candlestick holders. Here are two more components - vintage cookbooks and train cases.

These components both invoke happy childhood memories of time spent with my mom. I had a hand-me-down train case (one that my grandmother was no longer using when she traveled) that held all of my crochet supplies. As mentioned previously the books are copies (same publication year as my mom has) of cookbooks I grew up with.

If you've flipped through design magazines or blogs or browsed wedding photographers' galleries, you'll notice that vintage books and suitcases are everywhere. For example, check out:

• My Sparrow - Green Design: Vintage suitcases and luggage
• Bohemian Vintage - Bohemian Wednesday: Suitcases
• Classic Bride - Vintage Find: Traveling Trend + Suitcases Part 1, Part 2, Part 3
• Grey Likes Weddings - Vintage Engagement Session: Diane and Juan

With our invitations we're asking all of our guests to bring and share with us a favorite recipe. In this spirit, we're having train cases holding some of my favorite cookbooks from growing up for guests to browse during the cocktail hour. We'll post a mockup of our table displays in a later post.

How are you decorating your reception hall? Are you using touches that remind you of happy memories?

Where We G0t the Look:

• Amanda's Cookbooks on Etsy for cookbooks
• The Cottage Cheese on Etsy for both cookbooks (also has luggage)
• Jolee's Vintage on Etsy for cookbooks
• Old Vintage Cookbooks on Etsy for cookbooks
• Various eBay sellers for train cases and vintage suitcases

The Treachery of Labels (apologies to Magritte)

Names and labels have power, whether we want to admit it or not. Labels help us understand the world around us. Yet we tend to throw labels around carelessly. When we blog, we label, aka tag, our thoughts for others. With weddings, labels that are freely tossed about include "inspiration boards," "DIY project," "offbeat," and "budget."

Early on in planning I was drawn to "offbeat" content. However, I quickly found myself evaluating whether our ideas were original or unique enough (see my post on inspiration). Did I "belong" on an offbeat site when we were having a pretty traditional Jewish ceremony? (I don't count decisions to have sustainable, in-season food or flowers, environmentally conscious favors, or upcycled/vintage components as offbeat - we live in San Francisco and that's pretty normal around here.)

We came up with the theme for our wedding and decided upon the DIY projects we're doing to support our theme. As I looked for tutorials I routinely searched for "inspiration boards" or "DIY projects." I quickly learned that depending on which blog you follow or site you watch, these labels can mess with your mind. You often have to read carefully to find out whether or not the images are from a real DIY wedding, a produced wedding, or a photo shoot. (Other brides such as Becca at A Los Angeles Love and Liz at Chic on the Cheap have remarked on this phenomenon as well so I realized I wasn't alone.) If you're not thinking about it, these images and words can induce undue stress.

Staged and "almost-too-good-to-be-real" images led me to write my Stop with the Perfection post with the full support of my FH. (I later cross-posted this post to a couple of wedding boards upon his suggestion.) When I wrote the post and hit Publish Post, I didn't know what response I'd get. Sure there were a few snarky responses, but most comments and feedback showed that I wasn't alone in my struggle with industry pressure for weddings to be perfect. Many of us are afraid of contributing to the consumerism of the wedding industry, of friends and family labeling us a bridezilla, and of not having our day "measure up." I'm glad that I shared my feelings; it opened up a great dialog with friends and relieved stress that I was inadvertently applying to myself for no good reason.

One community that I've grown to love and look to is WeddingBee.com. The reason? Real brides who are honest - they share what worked, what didn't work, and they talk about what most brides are feeling but afraid to express. Take for example, Miss Scissors' post two days ago, "I've Stopped Reading Wedding Blogs." When she wrote, "All of these beautiful weddings, half-or-more of them staged, were screwing with my psyche. (Truth be told, they still do.) ... Seeing inspiration shot after inspiration shot after inspiration shot after inspiration shot… It just got to be too much for me. I needed to feel good and solid about what ... we were doing to make our wedding fabulous, fantastic, and us." I haven't gone cold turkey, but I have modified my bridal feed in Google Reader. I have three - Real Brides, Bridal, and Bridal - Staged Shoots. For ideas and guidance on stretching our wedding dollars and tackling reasonable DIY projects, I'll tune into Real Brides. And when I'm in the mood to look at photo shoots and get inspiration for my personal photography, I'll look at Bridal - Staged Shoots. If I forget which blogs feature real weddings and which tend to cover photography shoots and vendor services, this feed reminds to "Look at Content within at Your Own Risk."

Emily Anderson of Eco Chic Weddings issued a similar cry in a recent post, "Take Back Your Wedding." "Reality check. A lot of people in the wedding biz (for the most part) still don't get it. The messages are the same--here's this beautiful image/ idea/ product/ venue/ whatever...that you can't afford." I, for one, can't wait to see how she mixes it up going forward.

Another term that seems to be associated with a line you shouldn't cross is budget. As most people don't talk about money, budget is an emotionally loaded label without tying it weddings. There were three blog posts about budget that I especially appreciated. One from Jessica at The Budget Savvy Bride was about the relative definition of "budget" based on where you live and where you're hosting your wedding. I like her focus on "savvy" and "how far you can make your money go or how to maximize the budget you're working with, rather than a specific price tag."

The other post was from Miss Octopus. "I am an unabashed wedding enthusiast, and I will admit that going on flights of fancy about having every single pretty thing Martha Stewart Wedding dangles in front of my eyes is something I have indulged in once or twice (a day). ... When Mr. Octopus and I seriously started talking about “wedding” as in “fall 2010″ rather than “wedding” as in “someday”, I decided to start doing a little casual research—and then promptly had to be revived with a pair of electric current paddles. I had no idea what those dreamy ideas ... actually cost. I’m sure I’m not alone in this. ... Because of that, though, I’d really like to help other brides avoid the shock and awe that I felt upon discovering the price tag on this stuff. So, I intend to be completely transparent about our budget." Read the rest of her post for the rest of the details.

The final, most recent post, was from Becca at A Los Angeles Love in response to commenters. She explains quite eloquently the difference cost-of-living and having won the genetic lottery (being born into a family of caterers, photographers, etc. willing to provide free labor). She compares $2 well drinks in Texas with $6 well drinks in Los Angeles (the same multiplier applies here in San Francisco as well). All of a sudden $20,000 in San Francisco is a very clear "budget" wedding!

I'm not going to release our budget numbers into the great wild that's the Internet. I will say we won't make the $10,000 budget goal - which in San Francisco with a 100 or so guests is really tough (for a laugh check out this $10,000 SF Wedding Challenge post on The Knot). Friends are one of my three must haves and in our combined top five must haves (I'll explain the Top Three Things in a later post) so we weren't willing to invite only a subset to the wedding and then have a less expensive party that everyone was invited to. We don't want people to miss seeing us under the chuppah. Therefore, the largest expenditure in our budget is food and drink. And you know what? We'll still be stretching our budget dollars (and you'll be reading about how we did), but I don't feel guilty about the total number anymore (thank you Miss Octopus and Becca!).

What are you doing to stay sane? Did you redefine any labels? What communities/support groups are you part of?