Details: A Delicate Handkerchief

I think it's a done deal that come cubes' vows to me - if not before - I'm going to have tears in my eyes. Why? Cuz I had tears in my eyes when he said his impromptu, straight from the heart vows last week. (Mind you I was shaking like a leaf and had my own vows not been written down I don't think I could have strung two words together let alone managed an audible meep.)

Did you think about how to handle potential tears? Bride's stories of "The Ugly Cry" have only served to hone my focus. Please tell me that I'm not the only bride obsessing about this particular detail.

Nevertheless, here's what I'm planning. Going along with the vintage theme, I'd always been thinking of having a handkerchief close by (I can't see myself being aware enough to hide tissue or look classy dabbing my eyes).

(Source)

But where does a bride without pockets hide a handkerchief? Simple answer. In plain sight - if it's done right. And yes ours will be done right - held with my bouquet as these brides did.

Photography Credit: Picotte Photography via The Bride's Cafe

Photography Credit: Sarah Rhodes via Whimsical Wonderland Weddings

Photography Credit: Hillary Mayberry Photography via Style Me Pretty

Details: The Little Things

To anyone who knows me, they know I obsess about the little things. At our housewarming/engagement party this past February, I tucked silverware into coconut milk cans - we were hosting a Thai dinner.

One thing that used to drive me crazy as a photographer was taking photos of gowns on cheap plastic hangers. I actually brought wooden hangers with me to events. (Blame this idiosyncrasy on my grandmother and mother. Growing up almost all of my clothes were hung on vintage wooden hangers.) So of course, when it came down to what my dress would hang on (just for the shot as the weight of the dress will tear the lace bodice) I had to have custom hangers.

This afternoon my hangers made by The Painted House and More (Etsy) arrived. The hangers were chosen based on the colors in our wedding palette - dark brown hanger with silver wiring and black bows. (Yes I know - I'm going slightly overboard on the matching but the overall look of the photos is going to be awesome!)

Here's a sneak peek of my hanger. It was so neat to see my new last name on my hanger.

What do you think? Did you purchase special hangers for your dress?

My Dress and I - A Love Hate Relationship

In March I was elated. I thought planning would mean that I wouldn't be one of those brides stressing about last minute fittings or alterations.

In May I fretted about how fragile the lace bodice of my dress was.

In June I was excited. There was a simple, inexpensive fix that would strengthen and support the fragile lace - Power Mesh Fabric.

Well now it's July. Now I'm worried. Why? Timing, a tear, and some raveling. The plan was to reinforce the lace next weekend - the first weekend of August. Between the decision to reinforce the lace and when we'd actually do the work, I was just going to be super careful with it during my corset fittings.

Flash back to last week. My third corset fitting. We were double checking the fit of the corset under the dress. We were being super careful - I mean super super super careful. The kind of careful where you hold your breath, where you inch into the dress carefully supporting all of the material so that there's no way the bodice will be strained.

You can see where this is going. I mean, heck why didn't I see where this would end. Not well. The lace tore.

So the upside. At least the lace didn't tear when we were saying our vows in front of our Rabbi. Joking about a wardrobe malfunction and experiencing one are two totally different things. (It wouldn't have been as scandalous as the famous Superbowl Intermission Wardrobe Malfunction - we designed the corset to ensure that.)

More upside. After consultation with the experts at Lacis in Berkeley, there's a way to hide the tear, finish the edge of the lace, and reinforce the lace bodice. We can use the lace from the sleeves of my mom's dress. (You don't know how happy I am that we decided not to use the lace on my hat and veil.) A lace expert is available. She can fix the dress before the wedding in October.

The downside? It's a lot of handwork. And it's work that can only be done by an expert. Put those two things together and it might be quite an expensive fix. Hopefully only a couple of hundred dollars. But... if I want the fix to look intentional. That is to not look like a fix at all. It will be expensive. Why? Because right now the bodice also has lace applique. To finish the edge AND match the applique can be done. There's enough edge from the sleeves so that the front of the bodice will match the back (original unmodified). And there's enough pattern that we can match the applique. It just requires a lot of skill. And a lot of hand stitching.

So you're probably thinking - why bother? It's just a dress. At the end of the day it doesn't matter what you're wearing when you say "I Do." But see here's where you're wrong. It's my mom's dress. We haven't always been close. We worked on this together with the designer. When I put the dress on for the first time - her dress unmodified - she smiled a real smile. My mom doesn't always smile from the heart or the soul. And here she was smiling a real smile. A smile from the heart and soul for me. Maybe she's smiled this way for me in the past. I'd never seen it. And I actually didn't see this smile in person. Scatha captured this moment with her camera. And that's when I saw my mom's real smile.

So why is this dress important? This dress is important because it signifies what was always true but that I hadn't always known. It signifies that my mom loves me and has always been there for me even when I haven't seen it.

And like my relationship with my mom which hasn't always been easy. There was never any way my dress would be easy. Relationships take work. Foundations must be strengthened over time. This dress is more than a dress. It's a reminder to me to continue working to strengthen my relationship with my mom.

Details: Socks Matter to Us

We've been on the hunt awhile now for a pair of purple striped socks. True most people would never notice the socks the groom or the guys are sporting, but it's important to us. 

Why are socks important? That's easy. First many of our friends have homes where no shoes are allowed. This forces one to express their fashion sense and individuality via their socks rather than their shoes. Second once you start noticing people's socks you just can't stop. And third, I absolutely love - and I mean LOVE - those shots of the groom and the groomsmen with quirky socks (see last Friday's What Inspires Me post).

Unfortunately there just aren't that many options available for men when it comes to purple striped socks. Most - while labeled for men - appear to be thinly disguised women's socks which will not do. We want our guys looking fashionable, not dorky.

Here's what we considered (some less seriously than others). 

Navy and Gray

Punto $24 at Saks Fifth Avenue

(Source)

Blue

Punto $25 at British Apparel Collection, Ltd.

(Source)

Blue

Punto $25 at British Apparel Collection, Ltd.

(Source)

Purple and Gray

Punto $24 at O'Connell's Clothing 

(Source)

Navy and Purple

Thomas Pink $30

(Source)

Purple and Pistachio

Paul Smith $30 at Barneys New York

(Source)

Navy

Punto Italy $21 at TonsOfSocks

(Source)

When we found the Navy Punto socks we rejoiced. That celebration was short lived. We needed 4 pairs of socks. TonsOfSocks had exactly 1 pair. Idea! cubes will wear navy and the guys will wear black. Nope, not to be. No black striped socks.

Any ideas on where to find Punto Italy Navy Striped Socks? Did you find yourself spending way too much time on a seldom noticed detail?

Attended: Promises and Pearls - Decor Recap

First let me say that I'm really bummed we can't use our tapers. I absolutely love how candles warm up a space. The wall of votive candles is such a classy look - not right for our theme, but perfect for a modern theme.

I liked how some of the featured tablescapes didn't use fresh flowers but rather tree branches, succulents, fresh fruit. Some of the displays with a single flower or a couple floating in water were to me the most eye catching.

If I was planning a destination or summer backyard wedding in Texas or Southern California, I'd definitely consider this play on ceramic tiles. The colors are so vibrant. I can see where the caterer was going with the fruity tequila shooters but alas I'm a gal that likes my tequila/mescal straight up for sipping.

Many of my friends love their tea. So when I saw this Marie Antoinette-inspired table I was immediately drawn to it. It's quaintness and cozy feel seemed better fitted for a venue flush with wood or Victorian detailing. I could totally see a mid-morning or early-afternoon wedding tea reception at our venue - The Swedish American Hall. (It wouldn't have even been that hard to get the decor - my mom, my sister, and I all have antique tea cup collections.)

The Bently Reserve is a very elegant, chic venue with its chandeliers, grand staircase and columns. With the exception of the tile inspired tablescape and tea inspired tablescape, I could see all of these vignettes in this space. I could also see the following decor options working nicely in Mer, Terra, or DogPatch Studios - spaces that we'd considered initially.

One thing to keep in mind about your decor - how well will it stand up to your guests? If it looks good for just a few minutes, you might want to think of doing something different. 

Attended: Promises and Pearls - Vendor Recap

Hands down our (ok my) favorite vendor was Raffine Chocolates out of San Ramon. I love chocolate and OMG Raffine's sweet treats did not disappoint. For just over $2.50 each, we could treat each guest to a bite of heaven wrapped up in a box that matches our wedding colors.

At times it seemed as if Mooflyfoof and I were the only two brides getting married this year or in under six months. Because neither of us were engaged last year for the Third Annual Promises and Pearls we weren't really able to take advantage of vendor specials or planning tips. Most vendors for our respective weddings and receptions have already been chosen and are already booked.

Throughout the space, there were vendors offering furniture rentals, specialized table linens, chair covers and sashes - as well as the elusive Ghost Chairs.

I'm glad we didn't start our foray into the wide world of wedding planning at this event. The theme was decadence and neither of us embrace that in our every day lives. I kept thinking "Wouldn't it be great if there was a Maker's Wedding Salon or Etsy DIY Wedding Fair?" As both Make and Etsy options flow from authenticity, such a fair is probably unrealistic - each bride and groom have a different story to tell.

Formalwear as well as dress salons were in attendance. The trend appeared to be lots of bling - for bridesmaids as well as for the bride. I flipped through a bunch of catalogs scanning for potential Mother of the Bride outfits. I quickly realized that most MOB outfits are targeted for women in their late 40s or mid 50s. Or potentially women who have had some reconstruction work done that they want to show off.

The cupcake trend - reported by NY Times - to be dead, appeared to be still be in vogue. Although the cookie bar - no vegan options unfortunately - was more tempting to me.

Did you attend any Bridal Shows when you were engaged? What was your experience like?

Be sure to visit the blog tomorrow for the last Promises and Pearls recap featuring tablescapes.

Choosing: Adding Sprite to Our Cake Topper

We decided that we wanted our cake topper to include everyone in our family - us as well as Sprite. We have the pieces and now it's time to determine where we want to place Sprite.

Should Sprite be:

1. In front of the Groom and Bride looking forward (Option 1)?
2. In front of the Groom looking off to the left (Option 2)?
3. To the right of the Groom (Option 3)?
4. In front of the Groom looking up at the Bride (Option 4)?

What's your favorite arrangement?

The Details: Cake Topper Take 2

One of the first things we decided upon when we started planning was our cake topper. (We like our cake. I mean we really really like our cake.)

So we ordered a Elegant Robot Couple Wedding Cake Topper Space Princess Bride and Groom with Top Hat and Tails from Builder's Studio on Etsy.

(Source: Builder's Studio)

(Personal Photos)

Today while looking at Sprite I thought that she should make an appearance somewhere in our wedding.

Idea! Wouldn't it be great if we made a wooden Sprite for our cake topper? How hard could it be? cubes - the voice of reason on this journey - suggested seeing if we could purchase one. (Protip: Don't Google for Wooden Maine Coon Figurines, it returns urns for your loved one's ashes. Not a happy thought.)

We quickly found a ceramic LittleCritterz Maine Coon - 1 1/8 inches tall and 1 3/4 inches long on eBay.

Now where do you think Sprite should go? Out in front facing the same direction as us? Or out in front facing us?

Are you incorporating your pets in your wedding? How?

Does anyone really notice the details?

I sure hope so. Often times I'll think a particular DIY/DIT project is done. Then I'll write up a blog post and notice some little thing that isn't just right.

Miss Stripes at WeddingBee wrote The Details Do Matter earlier this month. I took a look at the footer of our invitation and the footer of our inserts and how if lined up side-by-side the height differed. (Probably no one - and I mean no one - is going to do this. We're going to bundle the inserts and RSVP card to the back of the invitation facing outward). I examined how the bundle of RSVP card and inserts left three lines of text stranded. I stared at my "final" mockup. And I stared. (You'll have to forgive me my obsession with design. I work in the online media all day every day and for me print is a luxury. A luxury that I want to grab people's attention, from the choice of the paper to the layout to the choice of words.) Then I realized we hadn't included our website or a contact phone number with any of the inserts. I stared some more.

And then, I decided to revise the footers so that the package would have clean lines and no orphaned text.

Once all the invitations and inserts have been printed and cut to size, the packet will be bound with a thin charcoal or navy ribbon.

Do you find yourself checking and doublechecking the details?

Sneak Peek: Save the Dates are Ready!

Color: PANTONE Inspiration Board

Initially our color scheme was primarily Black and Aubergine with accents of Ivory (My Dress), Espresso (My Boots and Anchor Steam Candle Holders), and Quarry (Platters used in Table Centerpieces and Vintage Keys).

After considering in-season flowers (dahlias and hydrangeas) and choosing a cake with pink frosting (Rose Water or Cotton Candy), we expanded the color scheme to include Rose Water and Cotton Candy, Majestic, and Watermelon (to tie the blues and purples together). The primary colors are Black, Aubergine, Watermelon, and Majestic. The accent colors are Cotton Candy (Wedding Cake), Ivory (My Dress), Espresso (My Boots and Anchor Steam Candle Holders), and Quarry (Platters used in Table Centerpieces and Vintage Keys).

Photo Credits: Hydrangea Floral Arrangement and Vintage Keys via iStockPhoto. Top: Jennifer Dery via Polka Dot Bride; Bottom: L'Amour De Ve via Bonafide Bride, Albert Lewis of Mulberry Photography (recolored to match our wedding colors) via Polka Dot Bride, Emersonmade via Bonafide Bride (recolored to match our wedding colors).

Sneak Peek: Postage has been ordered!

One of the products I loved when I was working event photography was custom stamps. So it was inevitable that yes we too - like many couples - would use a photograph for our postage. I've included a sneak peek of our stamps.

Creating stamps is pretty easy with Stamps.com. You just upload a photo that satisfies their content guidelines. You position the image where you want it by dragging and dropping. If you want you can add a variety of borders. I opted for borderless. It's as simple as that!

DIY Projects: Wedding Favors, Take 2

NOTE: Originally posted on LiveJournal.

Brides should not be allowed to perform math. Yes I have an engineering degree and yes I have taken many advanced mathematics courses - Calculus, Linear Algebra, and Differential Equations. But I am a bride. That means however rationally I usually approach an event or a tradeshow giveaway, anything wedding-related will be viewed through emotion-colored glasses.

I ran numbers for my dream wedding favor - a personalized cook booklet (see yesterday's post) - last night on the train and inadvertently used a price per bundle instead of the per book price (for example, $11.97 versus $3.99). You can guess what happened - immediate sticker shock ($1800 for 150 cook booklets) and heartbreak. (For 150 books, the bulk price ends up being $527 - 25 bundles or 100 books at the $13.57 bundle price ($339) plus an additional 10 bundles or 40 books at the $14.26 bundle price ($143) plus an additional 3 bundles or 15 books at the $15.16 bundle price ($46).)

I realized my error only after a night of trying not be heartbroken (and slightly - ok more than slightly - freaking out my fiance when I baked a chocolate cake at 10 pm at night). cubes when hearing the wrong costs tried opening my mind to other alternatives - possibly using FedEx Kinko's to copy/bind the booklet. If you hadn't guessed it by now I'm pretty stubborn. Once I get an idea into my head it'll take a force of nature to dissuade me.

So in an attempt to convince myself that booklets weren't feasible (after all if they couldn't be done the way I wanted, then they shouldn't be done at all!), I decided to look into what it would cost to create a booklet at FedEx Kinko's. After a quick (well not so quick) look at card stocks, specialty papers, and ribbons, I came up with another DIY project. It's also a cook booklet. But... unlike the Mini Photobook this DIY project matches the look and feel of our Save the Date Postcards and soon-to-be designed Wedding Invitations. This DIY project incorporates our wedding colors - purple/navy/ivory/silver. It requires less design expertise than the Photo Minibook approach (for the Photo Minibook, each individual recipe or page is laid out in Photoshop and saved as a JPG).

Equipment

• 2-hole paper punch
• Paper cutter
• Scissors

Raw materials needed

• Half of a sheet of 8.5"x11" Metallic Speckled Plum Vellum (http://www.paperandmore.com/vellum_paper_metallic_purple_plum_27.html)
• Half of a sheet of 8.5"x11" Natural Cream Linen Card Stock Cover (http://www.paperandmore.com/linen_card_stock_natural_cream.html)
• Either a 2"x2" or 3.25"x4.75" Photo Sticker with Our Names and Wedding Date (http://www.qoop.com/products/productPricing.php)
• 5-8.5"x11" Sheets of #70 Sand Paper cut in half for 10-4.25"x 5.5" 2-page spreads or 40 individual pages (http://www.paperandmore.com/plain_text_paper_sand_70.html)
• 5" of Navy Wraffia Ribbon (http://www.papermart.com/Product%20Pages/Product.aspx?GroupID=8700&SubGroupID=8701&ParentGroupID=19072#8701)

Raw materials for 150 cook booklets (not including tax or shipping) is approximately $211. Double-sided copying costs at FedEx Kinko's for this project are approximately $120 ($0.14 for 750 pages).

This DIY project is much more labor intensive than the Mini Photobook. Realistically your fiance and you (and any crafty volunteers) are cutting 1,050 pieces of vellum, card stock, and paper in half; punching 3,600 holes; adhering 150 stickers to the card stock covers; assembling vellum, card stock and 10 pieces of paper into a booklet 150 times; and tying 150 knots.

Now... on the plus side, you have 150-4.25"x5.5" cook booklets in your wedding colors with 40 individual pages of recipes/photos for roughly half the cost of a 3.75"x2.5" Mini Photobook with a glossy white cover and 18 individual pages of recipes/photos. As usual cubes has taken an idea and improved upon it - mending my heart in the process.

Have you found ways to make something you really want work within your budget? Has your FH helped you get perspective?

DIY Projects: Ideas for Wedding Favors

NOTE: Originally posted on LiveJournal.

I'm addicted to all things wedding or DIY at the moment. So of course our wedding favors would be a DIY project. We've had two different ideas - at two different points in time - about what they should be. First we thought a cellophane pouch with two fortune cookies (the art piece at Burning Man on which cubes worked last year and at which he proposed had a fortune cookie dispenser).

Then we thought a booklet with some of our favorite recipes as cooking and eating out are two activities that have been and are central to our life. My inspiration for our cook booklet came from my background as an events photographer. One of the services I offered clients was a Mini Photobook that included shots or collages from an event with quotes or well wishes from the guests. In "small" quantities these albums were cost effective. For example, 20-3.75" x 2.5" 20-page, softcover, stapled booklets was roughly $61 (http://www.qoop.com/photobooks/photofront/bulk_pricing.php?product=minibook&photosite_id=QPPS).

Our guest list - like most couple's - is going to drive many decisions. Right now it looks as if it's going to be somewhere between 100 and 150. So, not thinking about the longevity of the item and only looking at budget, this makes fortune cookies the clear choice. 350 fortune cookies with 4 personalized messages run $67 - $54 for the cookies (http://www.fortunecookiestore.com/mall/c100/s2935/cookie_custom.asp) and $13 for the cellophane bags (http://www.theboxdepot.com/cgi-bin/shopper.cgi?search=action&keywords=clearbags&template=Templates/clearbags.html). The cook booklet is more attractive for a keepsake but possibly too much for our budget - for 100 guests we'd be looking at $339 and for 150 guests we'd be looking at just under $600.

How are you choosing favors? Cost, relevance to you, something else?

Color: The Difference It Can Make

NOTE: Originally posted on LiveJournal.

Lots of wedding porn/blogs start with an inspiration board - what do you like or what's your vision. Those boards look like something out of Martha Stewart - kinda not the feel we're looking at. cubes proposed for the first time at Spurious Causality and we explored the Neverwas Haul shortly after. That's driven/influenced the overall feel for us - hence one of the reasons we chose Swedish American Hall in SF (built in the early 1900s).

We had our cake tasting last night and that got me thinking about whether hydrangeas or dahlias or a combination of the flowers (both are in-season in October) would go best with our cake choice (the raspberry frosting is pink/rose colored).

Take 1: Inspiration Board Using Dahlias as Focal Point

Take 2: Inspiration Board Using Hydrangeas as Focal Point

Take 3: Inspiration Board Using Cake as Focal Point